Friday, June 19, 2020

How may we develop Self-Awareness?


In my last post, I had written about how my young friend was able to shift his perspectives as he began to look inwards and develop some self-awareness.  When we are in the grip of some strong emotions, we are unable to view our situations dispassionately and arrive at a satisfactory solution for ourselves. We often find ourselves triggered when we encounter similar situations and find ourselves stuck in those emotional patterns. This in turn, gives rise to increased frustration with ourselves and the relationships or situations around us.

In this case, how may we start to cultivate self-awareness?

An important part of my journey through life begins with looking within myself  for insights. How do I react in certain situations? What triggers my emotional reactions to those situations? How may I choose to respond to other people in those situations, rather than react? And if I choose to respond, do I have better results in terms of those relationships? This exercise is important for children as they grow into their teenage years and beyond to high school and college. Teenage is particularly fraught with bewildering changes and is exacerbated with social pressures and the challenges of high school. As I am about to graduate from high school, what kind of work do I want to engage in? What kind of career would I like for myself? As I start to ask these questions, more insights emerge about who I am as a person. Do I like working with my hands?  Do I like working with other people?  Do I like helping other people? Slowly career choices start to crystallize.

The hope and desire is that the habit of seeking within for answers is encouraged and cultivated throughout one’s life.

On the flip-side, it is not just important for me to look within myself for insights and answers, but also necessary to gain an understanding of how others view me. Different research studies and articles on Self-awareness suggest that introspection alone is not enough to gain a comprehensive view of oneself.  Introspection alone may cause a person to be overly critical or harsh with himself and may be counter-productive in such cases. It is also important to seek to understand how others view us. This is particularly true in the work-place as I seek to make a space for myself in my career. And as I venture forth to build significant relationships in my life.

Self-awareness is, therefore, a balance between how I view myself and how others view me. In seeking to find out how others view me, I discover aspects of myself that I was unaware of – my ‘blind spots’ – which educate me and serve to give me a more comprehensive view of myself. While it is undoubtedly uncomfortable to seek and receive feedback from others, it offers me a window into myself and provides me with rich opportunities for growth and expansion. And as I become more open to seeking and welcoming feedback, I am actually able to respond to situations with an understanding that was not possible earlier. I therefore, become less reactive and more responsive.






2 comments:

  1. I post here a comment shared by my partner, Dr. T.T.Srinath:
    Very well written; simple, powerful and balanced.
    You have brought in the need to introspect and also seek from others.
    As you mention mere introspection may cause one to be either too self critical or completely be unwilling to look at one's growth areas; listening to others will help both validate one's opinion of oneself, reaffirm and oftentimes even provide new or additional data.
    The only risk is when an individual has introspected and seeks from others yet does not listen with ' openness', then whatever is being shared will either be construed as judgement or denied. You may like to add that when seeking from others it is important that the 'giver' of feedback provide data. In the absence of data the message may either be projection or opinion, both of which will not serve the purpose.

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